Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Mmmm, fall!

Happy Fall!!!!

Tree in Tatum's room


Tatum's crib and decorations




Brian and his parents at the Race for the Cure

Me and B at Race for the Cure... I walked, he ran

I love fall. I love everything about fall. Seriously, there is something wrong with how much I love fall.

I reeeeeally love fall decorations! I got some awesome new decorations at a 50% off sale at Hobby Lobby in August. It was all I could do to wait until September to put my fall decorations up. But you better know that September 1, our house was adorning fall decorations! I go walking just about every morning, and my favorite day to walk is Monday, because more people have time to put decorations out over the weekend, so there is a better chance of ‘discovering’ new decorations on a Monday morning. As I mentioned, in my world fall decorations go up beginning of September and then Halloween stuff gets added first of October… but I still ‘discover’ new fall decorations on walks even now… mid-end October! People… geeze, you’re killing me Smalls! Not that I am not grateful that you decorated… because it really does make my day. :)

As a side note though… I am not a fan of the really creepy Halloween decorations. I like the cute stuff… corpses and tombstones just freak me out a little.

More reasons I love fall- Brian’s birthday is in the fall; October 11 (Happy birthday plus 9 days Bri!!!). Our anniversary is in the fall; October 6. My birthday is in the fall; November 25.

Another thing I love about fall is looking forward to the Holidays. Even though we are blessed enough to have both of our parents here in Lubbock, I love getting to spend time just hanging out with them that seems to only happen around the Holidays. I also love traditions. In the last 2 years since Nathan died, my family has not really had traditions. I guess old traditions were just too painful and brought back too many memories for everybody. However, now Brian and I are starting to establish our own Holiday traditions, which has been incredibly fun. Plus, from now on we will be more than just a couple for the holidays; we will be a FAMILY complete with a daughter!!! Whoa. So now as I look forward to the family time coming up this holiday season, I have so much more to anticipate!

I even love the ‘back to school’ aspect of fall. This is my first year since, well…pretty much ever not to go ‘back to school’ in the fall. From high school I went straight in to college and from college straight to grad school. The only summer I ever had off was the one between college and grad school. So, needless to say, it feels very strange for me not to be in school right now. Good timing though.. :) It is super-lame to say that I was sad when everyone else got to go back to school in August and I didn’t? Because I was… I think the thing I missed most about not going back to school was not getting to go school supply shopping (I know… I keep getting lamer and lamer!). But, as a consolation, I did need a new planner even though I wouldn’t be in school anymore (heck, with 3-5 Drs appointments a week who can blame me). Also, I am just oddly obsessed with planners. It doesn’t make sense; don’t try to understand it. I just love planners. So I took an afternoon to go to Office Max (best selection, I can tell you from years of experience) to pick out a new planner. It is disgusting how much fun I had on this little outing. I was there for close to two hours… just walking around looking at all the new school supplies! Then the best part- time to pick out my new planner! This part alone took at least 30 minutes (which is the reason I did not force Brian to tag along… as understanding as he is, he just does not share my passion for day planners). And it was glorious. I love my new planner. Looking at it makes me happy. Bringing it home and filling it in with all of my appointments and dates was a blast for me! There were 2 months overlapping between my old planner and my new planner, that is 2 months that existed in my new planner that I hadn’t had it for since I had still been using my old planner. And you better believe that I still transferred over all the info for those 2 months, despite the fact that they had already past. So, for those of you wondering what I do with my free time- there you go :)

But my favorite thing about fall is new this year- we are having a baby this fall!!!!! How amazing is that!

Hoping everyone is enjoying their fall season as much as I am!

Monday, October 12, 2009

New Blog Site

After many unsuccessful attempts at figuring out how to add pictures to the old blog, I gave up. However, as you can see, I am already way ahead at this new blog- I already have pictures up!! YAY me! I feel confident that we will both derive greater joy from our blogging experience together if I have the ability/knowledge to post pictures. :) Because, lets face it, I am about to have a baby at which point no one will want to read anything I write, just see pictures of the baby. And I understand this, because I would feel the same way. So now we are all happy!

And to prove how good I am at this picture thing- A picture of me and Brian from the TTU vs. UNM game!


August 14, 2009- Pregnancy and BABY UPDATES!

I am still absolutely LOVING pregnancy! Part of me is so thrilled that Tatum will be here in 11 weeks, but the other part is really sad because that means I only have 11 weeks left of being pregnant. My body has defiantly undergone some changes over the last 7 months, some changes more enjoyable than others.

Here is a list of recent-ish developments:

- I am extremely hot about 88% of the time. This is very uncommon for me, as I am usually cold if it isn’t above 75 (inside or out). However, pregnancy mixed with 100 + degree Texas summer is defiantly beginning to have an impact. I know that pregnant ladies are always supposed to be hot, but I didn’t really started experiencing this until a few weeks ago. Maybe its because August tends to be the hottest month, or maybe it’s a third trimester thing. Either way, I am now a stereotypical preggo in this regard. :)

- Stretch marks… yeah. Not on my belly (yet…hopefully not ever, but at least not yet). Im not going to specify the location… but I will admit to some stretch marks. This has been my least favorite pregnancy development. I cried when I saw them. And then again when I told Brian about them. But, of course, he was as sweet as ever and promised he still loved me.

- I pee constantly. This is not a recent development, its been here the whole time, but I wanted to mention it anyway. I have read that there should have been some relief from this in the second trimester, but I didn’t get that. Might have been due to the gestational diabetes.

- Tatum has started kicking and/or punching my bladder. This is fun and yet not fun. Fun because I adore feeling her move in any way. Not fun because it hurts and I’m scared that one of these times it is going to make me wet myself.

- Baby Tatum gets the hiccups! Just about everyday, usually twice a day. When she first started I thought she was just really rhythmic with her punches and I got really excited thinking she would be a drummer like her daddy. Then it dawned on me that they were hiccups. Still exciting though. I think its so cute to feel and see her little hiccups.

- My belly button is neither and innie nor an outie. It’s a flattie. It keeps looking like it might pop out, but it hasn’t yet. I keep thinking that I am going to laugh really hard and it will just pop out.

- Speaking of laugh really hard, I do that a lot. Ever since I have been preggo, I find the silliest things to be absolutely hysterical! And I laugh extremely hard. I started laughing at a movie the other day and Brian was worried that I was going to hyperventilate. It was probably a legitimate concern.

- This is one of my favorites: I can usually find some part of Tatum when I poke around at my belly. It is so amazing to feel something hard and realize its her foot or leg! And it is especially breath taking when the hard thing I feel moves across my tummy. I can also feel her head down low in my tummy, but I am scared to push that too much… even though the sonogramist didn’t seem to think it was harmful when she was jabbing at it :)

- I get killer leg cramps in the morning if I don’t stretch before I go to bed. My calf turns into a rock and it feels like my leg is about to burst open and an evil mutant alien parasite will pop out and attack me.

Now for an update on the gestational diabetes front:

I test my urine (I know, gross… but handling pee has basically become a staple in my life) for keytones twice a day. Basically, if there are keytones it means I have not eaten enough carbs and that my body has begun burning fat for energy. In a non-pregnant person who is not underweight this is not a problem. Actually, for most people it would be a good thing because your body is burning fat. However, while fat is an acceptable energy source for my body, Tatum can not get any nutrition/energy from this process- she needs carbs. So I have to be very careful not so eat to many carbs and get high blood glucose, and not to eat to little carbs that Tatum is not getting enough nutrition. I have only had high keytones once. Occasionally I have small keytones, and more often than I would like I have trace keytones. It is difficult to find the balance between acceptable blood sugar and no keytones.

I test my blood glucose 4-6 times a day ( I got the number reduced due to good levels :) yay me!). I do this via my handy finger pricking kit. I also keep track of the numbers via my handy glucose chart. Although the pricker usually hurts me (I am not much of a bleeder, so I have to set it pretty high to get enough blood; if it doesn’t hurt it probably wont bleed for me), I am kind of addicted to it. Every time I eat something I cant wait for two hours to go by so I can make sure it was okay. It is a nice reassurance to KNOW what was okay and what wasn’t. Basically, if Dr. Bakdash (amazing endocrinologist) told me I didn’t have to prick anymore, I would anyway. Also, I really want to keep the pricker after I give birth… I hope the let me!

I am extremely happy/relieved/blessed to report that my sugar is good about 95% of the time! Both Dr. Bakdash and Dr. Devine were please with my levels. This is such wonderful news because if my sugar stays under control, chances are slim that Tatum will suffer any consequences. Please keep praying that she does not grow so large that they need to induce early or perform a c-section. I am praying for a natural vaginal delivery with no induction.

The final thing that I have to check daily (twice a day actually) is fetal movement. I watch the clock to see how long it takes her to make 10 distinct movements. 0-15 minutes is an A, 16-30 minutes is a B, and so on. So far she has been all As and Bs.

So, for those of you keeping score at home, that is 8-10 things I have to check and or monitor daily!! Good thing I have OCD tendencies which keep me extremely organized (or anal as Brian so fondly puts it :) )

We had another sonogram on Tuesday – everything looks great! She is a normal and healthy size for this point. She also has big pouty lips and long toes! She is also still a she! :)

We also found out that because gestational diabetes puts me and Tatum at higher risk, it is routine to perform twice a week non-stress tests from here on out. So this means that twice a week (Tuesday and Friday) I will go to Dr. Atkinson’s office and get strapped in with some super sweet belts with monitors on them so they can monitor her movements. Though a slight inconvience because this will take about an hour each time, I also kind of like it because that’s reassurance that shes doing okay twice a week! The scariest side-effect of gestational diabetes is increased incidence of stillbirth in the last trimester… something that makes my heart sink to even think about… yet I cant help it sometimes. So having them check her movements twice a week is comforting.

Well, this has become a very long post… so to encourage people to actually read what I write, I will stop here!

August 14, 2009- Home from Glorieta

t has been almost a week since we have been home from the b-e-a-utiful Glorieta, NM. Brian’s super amazing band, Pearl Merchant, was blessed to play worship there for collegiate week again this year. And I was blessed to get to tag along again! Last year I was just the merch girl, but this year- I was the merch girl/baby nanny!! I got to watch Matt and Sarah’s sweet (then) 6 week old daughter Kendi most nights and mornings during worship. I also got to spend some quality time with my boyfriend- 6 month old Jude, son of Laney and Jon. Spending so much sweet time with babies made me even more excited for the arrival of our own little bundle of joy! Just 11 weeks left!

While in Glorieta, the Lord led me to a few realizations.

1.) Over the past several months I have just been so humbled by the experience of being pregnant. It continues to amaze me that God allows us to participate in His creation in such a special way. He is allowing me to grow and develop one of His precious children inside my unworthy body! He, of course, does not need my assistance in creation by any means; yet he allows me a role- I get to participate. I get to carry this sweet child for nine months, and then I get to raise her. This humbling thought has brought tears to my eyes multiple times in recent months. However, during the week in Glorieta a new twist on this thought brought tears to my eyes. Both the morning and evening speakers spent some time focusing on our call to help others; whether that comes in the form of adopting orphans to just spending time doing something to care for another in need. Then this thought hit me: just as God allows and entrusts us to grow and raise His children, He also allows and entrusts us to care for his children all around us. Upon making this connection, I felt guilty for never before looking at the opportunity to serve others in the same light that I have looked at having children in. The homeless, the orphans, the widows…these are all God’s children just as much as my sweet Tatum is. Playing a role in caring for God’s children is by no means a new honor that has come about in my life since being pregnant, He has always allowed and desired for me to do this. But HIS children have never before been MY children… I am praying for a heart as open and loving toward ALL of His children as my heart is toward my own children.

2.) I am a very compassionate and loving person, but very few people actually see this side of me. For some reason, I am hesitant or maybe embarrassed to show people how much I care about and love them. This is particularly relevant in the context of strangers- I often feel so much compassion for someone sitting alone, or just looking sad in general but I am unable to muster the courage to show my care for this person. This also applies to the clients I have seen in the past. For some reason, it makes me uncomfortable to let clients know how much I truly care for them. I also realized that this is not okay. I am praying for the courage to show God’s love and compassion openly.

Well, that’s all for now… I will post again soon with some BABY UPDATES!! :)

July 17, 2009- Gestational Diabetes

A lot has happened since the last time I wrote anything on here… but what’s on my mind right now is gestational diabetes. That’s pretty much what’s been on my mind most of the time since I found out I had it.

When Dr. Devine’s office called me last week to tell me that my glucose test came back high, I honestly thought they must have mixed my results up with someone elses. I have always had low blood sugar…how could mine come back high? But, of course, I went the next day for more testing; thinking it would all come back normal. Well, after four hours of sitting in the hospital and four blood draws, my blood glucose was indeed very high. When the sweet nurse, Karen, called me with the results I was shocked. As soon as I got off the phone with her I called Brian and started crying. There are so many things that could happen to Tatum now. I was so scared.

I saw an endocrinologist on Thursday who made me feel a little better. He said my weight gain is normal and on track and I am otherwise very healthy. Because of those things, he thinks I have a good shot of being able to control the GD with just diet and exercise. If I am able to keep my blood glucose under control, Tatum should be fine. However, I left his office feeling VERY overwhelmed with all that I will have to do to keep an eye on my blood glucose.

Unfortunate things that will happen:I found out that no matter what, since I have GD, they will take Tatum away for at least a couple hours right after delivery to monitor her blood glucose. This is a bummer. I am going to barely get to see her, and then she will be taken away for hours. I know that is going to be hard. Also, she will have to have extra needles poked into her to test her blood. This is also a bummer.

Unfortunate things that are likely to happen:

Tatum may be too big to have a natural delivery or I may even have to be induced several weeks early. I really am hoping not to have a C-section. I also don’t want to be induced. Please pray that these things are not necessary. Tatum may also have low blood sugar when she is born and would have to have a sugar water IV. :(

There are also tons of other possible side effects of GD, that should be able to be avoided if I keep my glucose levels normal. I am really trying not to think about these other things.

Lots of people have been telling me that GD is “no big deal” or “nothing to worry about”, but I just cant buy into that. I know those people are just trying to comfort me, but it is annoying me a little. I feel like they are minimizing what I am going through and the fears I have. If it was nothing to worry about, then why would they even bother testing for it? And as far as it being no big deal… ha! I now have to test my blood glucose by finger prick at least six times a day. I have to test my urine for keytones twice a day. I have to keep logs of all those results. And I am on a very restrictive diet. I cant put anything in my mouth without questioning it first, and that is very stressful. And, because I know how harmful me stressing can be to Tatum, I stress out about the fact that I am stressed (yes I realize this is extremely counterproductive, but I cant help it).

Yesterday I ate what I thought would be a healthy, smart dinner and then when I tested my glucose afterwards, it was really high. I just felt so helpless. I was trying so hard to be conscious of what I was eating and pick something good, but my sugar was still so high! So, at lunch today I was standing in the kitchen trying to think of what I should eat for lunch. I felt so overwhelmed by everything that I didn’t even know what I should eat. I have never been good at knowing the ‘categories’ of what I eat. For instance, how many fats, sugars, and proteins something is (which is probably why I have never been on any legitimate diet before). I was so scared that I would eat something that would make my glucose too high that I couldn’t pick something to eat. I know that not eating is bad for Tatum, but I am scared that anything I put I my mouth is going to hurt her too. So I just started balling and Brian had to come help me decide what to eat.

I am praying that this will just be something that I need to get used to, and it will then come more naturally. In the meantime, I am so grateful to have Brian by my side to support me. I am not at all trying to complain about anything, because I know there is worse news to get during a pregnancy. I am just expressing what I have been feeling.

June 12, 2009- ITS A GIRL!!!

We found out on June 3 that we are going to be having a sweet baby girl!! :) The most exciting news is that they said everything looks healthy! We got to see her heart and her brain! It is so insane to me that they have the technology to see those things using just sound frequencies! And she is a wiggler too! She was moving around all over the place during the sonogram. The technician actually had a hard time getting a good shot of her heart at first because she was moving so much. :) So cute! Other than hearing that she looks healthy, the most amazing part of the experience for me was seeing her profile- we got a great shot of her face! I can not even begin to explain the emotions that shot through my body when I saw her face on the screen. My heart was overflowing with love for our sweet baby who I haven’t even met yet. Such wonderful feelings.

Also, I feel her move a lot now! Mostly at night, but also sometimes when I sit still throughout the day. It is the coolest feeling I have ever experienced! I wish that Brian was able to feel her too, but he cant quite yet. On the other hand, being the only one who can feel that life inside me is so special. I am so grateful that I am a woman! I was asking Brian the other day of he is jealous that he will never get to be pregnant. He laughed at me and I think he thought I was kidding. But really, if I was a boy, I would be jealous. Boys never get to know what it feels like to have a life inside of them… Brian will have to wait until our daughter is born before he can hold her…I have already been holding her for five and half months. I just think that being pregnant is such a special blessing. We are so blessed that God allows us to play such an integral part in His creation. I am so unworthy, yet He chose to use my body to care for one of His children. And He allows us to raise and love His children. It is incredible and mind blowing and extremely humbling to think about.

On a similar note, I have felt especially close to God the past several months. There is just something about knowing that His hand is at work inside me, creating life, the life of my daughter.

Other cool baby related things right now:

- We know her name! But I cant say it on here yet… because I haven’t told my parents yet. And they might get territorial if you knew before they did. Hehe! We know her name and you don’t, na-na-no-boo-boo!

- I have been having so much fun picking out baby bedding. We haven’t decided on anything yet, but I have literally spent hours online looking at stuff. If anyone ones to weigh in with their vote, the finalists are:

Also, if anyone knows anything about the websites above and their quality, etc. please share!

May 10, 2009- A Relaxing Saturday

Well, I have officially finished my first week at my new internship! I have really enjoyed it so far. I am working in the methadone clinic at Sunrise Canyon MHMR. I have to be there at 6:00am… gross, but not as bad as I thought it would be. I am really tired in the afternoons, but make it through the morning okay. And since I get off around 12:30ish its works out well. I think I need to get in the habit of afternoon naps… J My supervisor, Steve, is a really great guy to work with. This past week I basically just followed him around like a shadow, so I have gotten to know him fairly well already. I haven’t gotten to see any clients on my own yet, but I’m grateful for that because I don’t feel comfortable with my substance abuse counseling skills just yet. I have never counseled anyone for substance abuse before….probably a (very) good idea to take advantage of supervision!

Also, I take urine samples. That’s correct. I watch people (females only) pee in a cup. Awkward. Probably more so for the pee-er than for me, but still.

I have found myself thinking about Nathan more than usual lately. At first I thought it was because it was getting close to May (I know its already May now…but this started before May) and his birthday is May 31. It is also starting to get close to the 2 year anniversary of his death, which will be September 4. But a few weeks ago the real reason dawned on me. And by dawned on me, I mean fell on me like a ton of bricks. It is because I am going to have a baby soon. I know, that doesn’t make immediate sense to most people, so let me explain. Nathan LOVED babies. And babies loved him. To be honest, a lot of grown ups didn’t necessarily love Nathan because he had a tendency to be a bit self-centered and often arrogant. Thus, he is not the type of person I would have described as a ‘people person’. But for some reason, he was great with babies. He had such a soft-spot for them and was so good with them. So it is really difficult for me to know that my son/daughter will not have Nathan in his/her life. Having a wedding without Nathan there was not easy…but no where near this though. I know that if Nathan was at my wedding he would have been jealous that it was not all about him, and I know he would have done something to try to change that. But if he were still here, I know he would be so excited for me and Brian (I know that he is even more excited where he is now…but I don’t get to see his face or experience the joy of his excitement). And I know he would have looooved being an uncle. And he would have loved spoiling his niece/nephew. So, to make a long story short, realizing that I will not get to see my big brother love on my baby in this life is a tough pill to swallow.

Now, on to more cheerful pregnancy news:

At work on Wednesday TWO people asked me if I was pregnant!!!! J One was a co-worker and one was a client. The co-worker looked at me funny, poked me in the stomach, and then asked. This would have been THE PERFECT opportunity to look confused and say no. It would have been totally awesome! Yet, I was so dang excited I got a goofy grin and said “Oh, can you tell?!”. Well, duh she could tell or she wouldn’t have asked. Nonetheless, I was thrilled. Then about 30 minutes later a client asked. Awesome day! J

Oh sick, Jia just tooted and it is rank!

Our baby is the size of an apple this week! Not including the legs. And on June 3 we get to find out if it’s a she or a he!!! June sounds forever away, but it is less than a month now! Also, the thought of bacon-ranch is horrid. I like bacon (okay, reeeeally like bacon) and I like ranch, I even like bacon in ranch dressing…but the thought of bacon-ranch is yuck. Before I got pregnant I used to really like chicken and bacon-ranch pitas, but not anymore. I saw bacon-ranch at Wal-Mart this morning…. I guess that’s why I felt the need to share that. Needless to say, I did not purchase the bacon-ranch. And I also avoided the Vienna sausage aisle so I wouldn’t be temped.

I have promised myself never again to go grocery shopping at Wal-Mart on a Saturday. It is so busy…people leave their carts in the middle of the aisle, kids running all over, general mayhem. It left me feeling frazzled. To make it up to myself, I bought chocolate covered doughnuts from the bakery. And I have to confess, I opened the box and ate one before I had even left the parking lot. Before I had even put the car in drive actually.

I still haven’t figured pictures out… stay tuned!

April 23, 2009- Thats MRS. Ziggy to you!

12 weeks and 6 days!!!!!!!!!!!

Sooooo….

This post is dedicated to my poor baby puppy, Ziggy, who became a woman yesterday. She is in heat. And it is pitiful. First of all, she LOVES to play outside with her big sister (black lab) Jia. But not she has to stay inside except when I go out with her to potty (I don’t pee with her…just stand outside with her. To be clear.) She thinks this is torture. And to add to the cruelty, I have to keep Jia outside and away from Ziggy because Jia has been really aggressive with her since she has been in heat. Those two dogs are best friends, so they both hate that. And, the icing on the cake: Ziggy has to wear a diaper. And she haaaates it! She has stopped trying to take it off, but she won’t walk and just stares up at me with pitiful sweet eyes begging me to take it off. L My poor baby!

In other, more cheerful news, I just found out I got the internship I have been really hoping for at Sunrise Canyon! YAY!! I just got off the phone with my new supervisor and he seemed like a really great guy (phew!). We are meeting next Tuesday to go over details, and I am thrilled! Stay tuned for updates on that.

Now for what you’ve all been waiting for…drum roll please (Brian, can you hook me up?)…. Pregnancy news!!!

Unfortunately, I don’t have a really cool update or anything. Our next appointment is next week, and I can’t wait to pee in a cup and hear the heartbeat again! Well, actually, peeing in a cup I can wait on. But I am so excited to be able to hear our baby’s tiny heart beating again! It was 168 bpm last visit.

OOOOO, I do have cool news: Just one week and one day left of my first trimester!!!! I am really hoping I get my energy back. The nausea has been better on average for the past few weeks already, which I have been very grateful for. But I feel like this first trimester has been trying to go out with a bang because the past several days I have felt pretty crummy again. Brian and I were talking last night, and we both admitted that if I feel good for too many days in a row we start getting a little nervous and then when I have a sicky day, we are both a little relieved! Hehe!

Brian and our parents have been able to notice my belly for several weeks already, but most other people haven’t been able to tell. I think I am still in the “I look like I have just had a few too many brownies” phase. No one has noticed my tummy and asked yet. I am so excited for the first time that happens! I am tempted to get a really hurt look on my face and say that I have just been under a lot of stress or something. But that would probably be really mean. But funny… However, I have noticed several people I know who don’t know yet (mostly clients or people I don’t see often, because I have already told everyone else!) looking suspiciously at my stomach though. And when I have told people I have gotten a lot of “I was wondering!” or “I had a hunch you might be!” type of responses. I just want someone to be brave and ask! J Of course, if it was me I wouldn’t ask either. But I just want to feel like my belly is finally legit.

On a side note, I LOVE maternity jeans!!! Some of them may be mom-butt or funky looking, but they are dang comfy!! I really think I want to keep wearing maternity pants even after the baby and I lose the weight… is that weird? I wish I would have discovered maternity pants years ago. Its like wearing sweats, but really wearing jeans. For those of you females who have never been pregnant, go try on some maternity pants. They will change your life.

I still haven’t had any crazy cravings. I have been crazing Gatorade and PowerAde lately. Dad would probably say that’s because my body needs salt or something. But no strange or gross cravings. When I was grocery shopping a few weeks ago, I really wanted to buy some Vienna sausages. Which would normally totally gross me out and I would not normally eat. I didn’t buy any because I don’t think they are exactly very nutritious. And probably the real reason was that I thought I would chow them down and then think about what I just ate and then get sick. I ate a burger last week too! And it didn’t make me sick! Most of the time burgers still don’t sound very appetizing, but the thought no longer makes me sick. Patty melts are another story…nasty.

And, as always, I continue to be spoiled by sweet Brian! He is so encouraging to me when I am frustrated with something at school or Hospice or when I just don’t feel good. His hugs can turn my whole day around in a matter of seconds. I think he has some sort of sixth sense for knowing when I have had a rough day. For instance, I was not feeling very good all day on Monday. But I didn’t want to tell Brian because I feel like I am always saying I’m not feeling good these days, so I decided to spare him on Monday. I was also pouting silently to myself because I wouldn’t get home from Hospice until about 6:30 and he had to leave our house for rehearsal about 6:10 and wouldn’t be home for over an hour. All I wanted to do was lay in his lap, but I was going to just miss seeing him! Boo! But when I walked in the door, sweet sweet Brian has left me a surprise!! Hanging right inside the garage door was a Texas Rangers jersey and hat!!! He had bought them for me earlier that day and not told me. It was such a sweet surprise and it made my whole day seem like it had been wonderful! And the best part: I never even told him I was having a rough day! Isn’t he amazing? I love you Brian James Maines!

** I really want to learn to put pictures on here so I can show you Ziggy in her diaper!

April 7, 2009- We're PREGNANT!!

HA! I started this blog in July and this will be my first ‘real’ post. Nice. But I promise to be better from now on. I have wanted to start a blog for a long time (which is why I made this one in July…), but I always seem to be too busy between school and keeping up with the house. But I will make time from now on!

Hmmm… lets see..

Of course, I am married to the most wonderful and amazing man of all times, Brian James! He really is such a great husband. I admire and respect him beyond words. He is such a hard worker. And he never complains about his sometimes very busy schedule. He is also the world’s best drummer… but I think everyone already knows that! I love knowing how much he loves me and how he would literally do anything for me. He spoils me.. a lot! And he is always so patient and kind with me. God really blessed me with Brian. And he is a blessing to me every single day.

I am about to finish up my masters in counseling. I will be finished with class at the end of this semester, then I just have one more internship to finish up over the summer before I can officially say “I’m done!”. I don’t know what I’m going to do with out school. It’s weird to think about. But I have been in school full time including summers since I started college 5 years ago. I have never been a wife without being in school (Yes, Brian is a very patient husband! J). So really, I have never not been a student since the time I started kindergarten. However, I’m sure that becoming a mom will take up the extra time I have after finishing up school!

On that note, for those of you who don’t yet know, Brian and I are about 10 and a half weeks pregnant! YAY!!! Sweet Baby Maines is due October 30! We are excited beyond words at this new chapter of our lives.

Pregnancy has been really fun (at least for me… I can’t speak for Brian, since he’s the one who’s had to put up with me!). I think the best part so far has been getting to tell everyone. Telling Brian was so much fun! I was so excited that I had to tell him right after I found out. Then we waited a couple weeks to make sure it was real before telling our families. Both of our parents were so excited for us…and them J. Jeremy’s reaction was pretty priceless (I told him we were six weeks and he said “Okay…you just told me that you and Brian had sex six weeks ago, and that is more that I needed to know!”). Hehe! Josh didn’t exactly pick up on the hints we were giving him and finally said “Are you trying to tell me something?” Brothers are so silly. It has just been so wonderful to watch the faces of the ones we love light up with excitement for us when we tell them our news.

Pregnancy has also had some other fun side effects. Most people don’t think these are that fun, but they have been exciting for me. I am referring, of course, to morning sickness and its fun symptoms. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t necessarily like feeling sick, but its fun knowing that I feel like crap because my son or daughter is developing inside of me! My first “pregnancy throw up” happened a week after we found out. I’m not going to lie, it was pretty awesome! I came out of the bathroom with a huuuge grin on my face, which Brian found humorous. And I really wanted to text my mom about it, since I was so excited. Unfortunately, it happened before my parents knew, so I couldn’t share my cool story yet. Other fun things include how incredibly difficult it has become to brush my teeth. It gags me to brush my tongue, but my mouth feels way to grody if I don’t (when I was younger my mom would always tell us that not brushing your teeth good in the morning is like ‘sucking on a turd’), so its usually a pretty interesting balance. Sometimes I start gagging even before I get to my tongue, because I know its coming. Also, I am very sensitive to smells. Considering that Jia, our black lab, is infamous for her gas, this also gets interesting.

I have also been extremely fatigued the past 6ish weeks. But sweet Brian has really been awesome to me. He is always willing to help out around the house. He even usually ends up making me dinner (he makes his dinner too, but usually not the same thing as me…my food repertoire has become limited due to nausea). And he has never once complained about it. I feel so useless and lazy on those days, but he is always encouraging and sweet to me. I really would be a mess without him. I LOVE YOU B!

Well, I guess I have written enough for now. But I will keep posting about all of the excitement of being a mother-to-be!!