t has been almost a week since we have been home from the b-e-a-utiful Glorieta, NM. Brian’s super amazing band, Pearl Merchant, was blessed to play worship there for collegiate week again this year. And I was blessed to get to tag along again! Last year I was just the merch girl, but this year- I was the merch girl/baby nanny!! I got to watch Matt and Sarah’s sweet (then) 6 week old daughter Kendi most nights and mornings during worship. I also got to spend some quality time with my boyfriend- 6 month old Jude, son of Laney and Jon. Spending so much sweet time with babies made me even more excited for the arrival of our own little bundle of joy! Just 11 weeks left!
While in Glorieta, the Lord led me to a few realizations.
1.) Over the past several months I have just been so humbled by the experience of being pregnant. It continues to amaze me that God allows us to participate in His creation in such a special way. He is allowing me to grow and develop one of His precious children inside my unworthy body! He, of course, does not need my assistance in creation by any means; yet he allows me a role- I get to participate. I get to carry this sweet child for nine months, and then I get to raise her. This humbling thought has brought tears to my eyes multiple times in recent months. However, during the week in Glorieta a new twist on this thought brought tears to my eyes. Both the morning and evening speakers spent some time focusing on our call to help others; whether that comes in the form of adopting orphans to just spending time doing something to care for another in need. Then this thought hit me: just as God allows and entrusts us to grow and raise His children, He also allows and entrusts us to care for his children all around us. Upon making this connection, I felt guilty for never before looking at the opportunity to serve others in the same light that I have looked at having children in. The homeless, the orphans, the widows…these are all God’s children just as much as my sweet Tatum is. Playing a role in caring for God’s children is by no means a new honor that has come about in my life since being pregnant, He has always allowed and desired for me to do this. But HIS children have never before been MY children… I am praying for a heart as open and loving toward ALL of His children as my heart is toward my own children.
2.) I am a very compassionate and loving person, but very few people actually see this side of me. For some reason, I am hesitant or maybe embarrassed to show people how much I care about and love them. This is particularly relevant in the context of strangers- I often feel so much compassion for someone sitting alone, or just looking sad in general but I am unable to muster the courage to show my care for this person. This also applies to the clients I have seen in the past. For some reason, it makes me uncomfortable to let clients know how much I truly care for them. I also realized that this is not okay. I am praying for the courage to show God’s love and compassion openly.
Well, that’s all for now… I will post again soon with some BABY UPDATES!! 
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